Scarborough Fair Crème Brûlée

It was April, 2011. My boyfriend and I had just bought ice cream and were taking a walk around town. The trees in New Haven were bursting with pink blossoms. While I thought to myself "could life get any better?" my boyfriend trudged next to me, despondently. I couldn't figure out what was eating him until I realized that it was Easter. Although he was never religious, it was his first Easter where he didn't go home and celebrate with his family.

We got back to the apartment around 2pm, and I made an excuse that I needed something from the pharmacy. From there I frantically drove to four different grocery stores, desperately trying to find one that was open. Finally I discovered a budget grocery store that wasn't closing for another 20 minutes. My time and my options were limited, but I found 10+ pound ham, potatoes, mostly edible green beans, a massive bag of shredded cheese, etc. Three hours later a passable Easter dinner was on the table and our friends gathered round.

The boyfriend didn't last, but the tradition of making Easter dinner for my friends did.

I've since added giving my friends small Easter baskets like this:

(Almost) completely edible flower pots!

And the meals have become more elaborate, consisting of multiple courses and wine pairings.

Food Porn

But I'm wandering away from the point. The point is, I made an awesome crème brûlée this year. It was inspired by a cocktail that my super-talented friend Ed created. (For those of you that live in New Haven, Ed bartends at Heirloom. Do yourself a favor and order a drink from him. You won't regret it.)

Scarborough Fair Crème Brûlée

yield: 8 servings

     Ingredients:
     1 tsp. chopped rosemary
     1 tsp. thyme leaves
     1-2 tsp. chopped sage
     1 tbsp. chopped parsley leaves
     2 large lemons
     3 cups heavy cream
     Pinch of salt
     10 tbsp. turbadino sugar (like Sugar in the Raw)
     6 large egg yolks
     1/2-1 tsp. vanilla

     Equipment:
     8 (4-oz) flameproof ramekins
     Blowtorch (preferable)
     Fine-mesh strainer

1) Preparation.

     Directions:
     a) Preheat your oven to 325 degrees F.
     b) Grate the skin of each lemon using a zester and reserve.
     c) Juice your lemons and reserve juice.
     d) Chop your herbs.

2) Make the custard.

     Directions:
     a) In a heavy 2 or 3 quart saucepan, stir together cream, lemon zest, and herbs. Heat over medium-low heat, stirring.
     b) Once cream is warm, add in 7 tbsp. sugar and a pinch of salt. Keep stirring.

     c) Heat and stir until the cream is almost boiling. It will be 180 degrees F. Remove from heat, cover, and steep 10 min.
     d) After cream has steeped, strain the cream into a large bowl and throw away the herbs.
     e) Lightly beat egg yolks in a separate bowl.
     f) Add a tablespoon of the warm cream to the yolks and mix. Repeat two or three more times to temper the eggs.
     g) Add the beaten yolk and cream mixture to the strained cream and whisk.
     h) Add in 1 tsp. lemon juice and vanilla. Whisk some more.

3) Cook the custard.

     Directions:
     a) Divide the custard among the 8 ramekins.
     b) Place the 8 ramekins in a deep cake pan or roasting pan. They should not touch.
     c) Boil some water and pour it in the pan about halfway up the ramekins. Be careful not to get water in the ramekins.
     d) Bake until the custards are set around the edges and only wobble a little in the center when the pan is shaken, 30-40 min.
     e) Let the whole pan (water and everything) cool for 20 minutes or so.
     f) Remove ramekins and chill (uncovered) in the refrigerator 4 hours or overnight.

4) Fire it up!

     Directions:
     a) Place ramekins on a flame-retardant surface.
     b) Evenly sprinkle 1 tsp. sugar over each custard.

     c) Carefully move a blowtorch set at a medium-low flame across each ramekin, slowly and evenly, until all the sugar is caramelized. If you don't have a blowtorch, you can put the ramekins on a pan and stick them under the broiler in your oven, watching them carefully to keep from burning. If you don't have an oven, a basic torch lighter (like what you use to light a grill) will work too, although much more slowly and much less evenly.

     d) Allow custards to sit for 3-5 minutes to harden the candy shell.
     e) Garnish with an herb sprig.

Too much company wore this puppy out!

Kicky Beet Salsa

Oh Trader Joe's. You are truly the love of my life. I can go hog-wild buying stuff I don't actually need (every kind of nut seasoned with wasabi? Don't mind if I do) and never break $100. So when I saw these Horseradish-Cheddar Kettle Chips, I had to have them. It doesn't matter that I'm not a huge chip fan. It doesn't matter that I'm not really a snacker.

I. Had. To. Have. Them.

I grinned like a crazy person bringing my treasure out of the store. Then they sat on my self. And sat some more. They were still sitting a month and a half later.

Every time I looked at those chips I felt guilty. I felt like I was being a horrible partner to Trader Joe's. Every time I went in that store I could swear all the happy people in Hawaiian shirts would suddenly stop smiling and glare at me knowing that I wasted one of their marvelous creations without even trying it. They knew. Just like grandmas always know when you don't wear the sweater they knit for you, Trader Joe's knew.

It was time to remedy my guilt. So for a girl's scrapbooking night I came up with this salsa recipe to complement the chips. The two were delicious together. But here's a little secret: the salsa is delicious without the chips, too. The salsa was delicious on top of tilapia. It was delicious with lamb. Heck, it was delicious off a spoon when I waited too long to cook dinner and was ravenous before the timer went off.

It has the perfect amount of kick to it from the horseradish, but the beets lend plenty of earthy sweetness. So here's a recipe to "kick it up a notch." (I hate myself for saying that.)

Kicky Beet Salsa Instructions

yield: about 4 cups
   
1) Roast your beets

     Ingredients:
     4 small to medium beets

     Directions:
     a) Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
     b) Slice off beet greens and wash beets.
     c) Place beets together in an aluminum foil packet. Place packet on a baking sheet.
     d) Bake packet for 50-60 min until the beets give slightly.
     e) Let beets cool enough that you can comfortably touch them.
     f) Rub off skin with your fingers.
     g) Roughly dice.

2) Mix your salsa

     Ingredients:
     3 tbsp. grated fresh horseradish or 2 tbsp. prepared horseradish
     1/4 cup chopped fresh dill
     salt to taste
     2 tbsp. fresh lemon juice
     2 tbsp. minced shallots
     1/2 green apple (roughly diced)
     2 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil

     Directions:
     a) Place diced beets and all other ingredients in a food processor.
     b) Pulse in 1-second intervals about 20 times, stopping every 5 pulses to scrape down the sides.
     c) Alternatively, you can do all this without a food processor by chopping very finely.
     d) Empty into a container, cover, and chill at least 2 hours before serving.

3) Serve with chips, on fish, on chicken, on steak, on celery, on a spoon...

For a less messy (but perhaps not as pretty) salsa, you can use golden beets instead of red beets. It will taste the same.

Man Cakes #1

MAN CAKE!!!!!!!!!!!
I used leopard-print wrappers because leopard is a neutral. Every man likes leopard. Okay, maybe it's just me that likes leopard, but I've never had anyone refuse a cupcake and then throw it at me because of not liking the wrapper.

I named this cupcake "Man Cakes #1" because "Man Cakes" is such a great name I'm sure I'll use it again.

Bus+Stripper Pole=Party Bus

I made this cupcake originally for my brother's bachelor party. That's right-- it was a co-ed bachelor party, and I was his "Best (Wo)Man." It was pretty much the perfect party. We drove to San Diego from LA where we met about 20 of Chris's friends and hopped onto a party bus. The driver was wearing a pin-striped vest, tight jeans, and a fedora; and the bus had poles running through it. The only thing these could possibly be for is sexy dancing, which my brother's female boss proceeded to do. Our driver took us to 3 of San Diego's best breweries: Green Flash, where we had a tour; Stone, where we ate lunch; and Lost Abbey, where we tried our best not to fall asleep from too much alcohol. I gave these cupcakes out after Lost Abbey to try and revive everyone. We were supposed to go to Mission as well, but never made it to the last one. Once we had all cleaned up/napped, we headed out to a gastropub for dinner. We ate outside in the beautiful, warm San Diego air, and everyone made a speech for my brother. From there we ended up at an Irish bar/dance club, and the night ended with quesadillas sometime around 3:30am.

My brother (aka: the bachelor), my father (Yes! Even Daddy was invited to the bachelor party!) and me at Lost Abbey

Because we were traveling, I baked the cupcakes in jars for my brother's bachelor party. Instructions on how to do that can be found here.

The second time I made these cupcakes was for my friend Alex's birthday. Alex and I met about a year-and-a-half ago at a mutual friend's birthday party. We started talking when I noticed his shirt said "BaconStripsandBaconStripsandBaconStripsandBaconStrips." From there we discovered our shared love of beer, and we've been spending time together ever since. A couple days after his birthday, he came over to meet some of my other "beer friends" and we toasted him with beer and bacon-themed snacks, including this one.

Man Cakes #1 Instructions

yield: 10 cupcakes

1) Prepare the cupcakes

     Ingredients:
     1 cup scotch ale (I used Old Chub by Oskar Blues for Alex's birthday. Don't remember the one I used for Chris's bachelor party, but it was something from San Diego)
     1 tsp. apple cider vinegar
     3/4 cup brown sugar (light or dark is fine)
     1/3 cup baking oil (I used avocado but canola would work well, too)
     1 1/3 cup all purpose flour
     3/4 tsp. baking soda
     1/2 tsp. baking powder

     Directions:
     a) Follow instructions #1-4 for hipster PBR cupcakes found here. But use scotch ale, not PBR.
     b) Let cupcakes cool on wire racks.

2) Cook some bacon!

     Ingredients:

     1 lb. high-quality bacon (I used the applewood smoked bits and ends from Trader Joe's)

     Directions:

     a) Preheat a large pan over medium heat.

     b) Chop your bacon into pieces about 1/2 inch across.

     c) Add bacon to pan and cook, turning occasionally until crisp (about 6-7 minutes). You may need to do this in batches.

     d) Remove bacon from pan using a slotted spoon and place in a bowl. Chop if any of the pieces are still too big to put on top of cupcakes (as crumbles).

     e) Reserve bacon drippings by placing 4 layers of cheesecloth over the top of a glass jar and straining the cooled drippings through the cheesecloth. Do not put your drippings in the fridge yet, because you want them room temperature.

3) Glaze your cupcakes.

     Ingredients:

     1 tbsp. liquid bacon drippings

     1 tbsp. maple syrup

     Directions:

     a) Poke holes in your cooled cupcakes using a toothpick. Aim for 7-10 holes per cupcake.

     b) Mix together the bacon drippings and maple syrup in a small bowl.

     c) Using a 1/2 tsp. spoon, pour bacon-maple mixture over each cupcake slowly enough so that it can seep into the holes. Some may spill, so it's helpful if you leave the cupcakes in the pan for this to catch any spills.

     d) Store any leftover bacon drippings in the fridge and use them in place of butter or olive oil in almost anything--for frying quesadillas, for scrambling eggs, for putting on top of toast.... Okay, I'm kidding about that last part (maybe).

4) Mix your maple cream cheese frosting. Note: The following recipe is adapted from one you can find here.

     Ingredients:

     8oz cream cheese, softened

     8oz unsalted butter, softened

     1 1/2 cups powdered sugar 

     3 tbsp. maple syrup

     Directions:

     a) Using an electric mixer, beat your cream cheese and butter together until combined and smooth.

     b) Add in the maple syrup and beat until combined.

     c) Add in the first 1 1/2 cups powdered sugar and beat at high speed until light and fluffy.

     

5) Assemble your parts.

     Ingredients:

     10 glazed scotch ale cupcakes

     maple cream cheese frosting

     bacon crumbles

     Directions:

     a) Using either a star-tip or a round-tip, pipe frosting onto cupcakes.

     b) Top with crumbled bacon bits. 

     c) Unzip your pants, scratch a little bit, and eat your cupcake like a man.

The birthday man (Alex) with his MAN CAKE

I Love You (Snow-day) Soup

About once or twice a winter, Connecticut gets hit with a bad snowstorm. Today is one of those days. Since my schedule has been so crazy recently, I decided to take today (mostly) off from doing work and instead take down my Christmas decorations (Valentine's Day is tomorrow--it is time) and cook myself some nice meals to prepare for the weekend.

My snowy valentines! My loves got bacon leftovers.

As I looked around my refrigerator, I realized that I had the makings of a French Onion soup. I also had bacon. Is there anything that bacon doesn't improve? So after some poking around at various recipes online, this is what I did with my snow-day. The soup takes a LONG time to cook, which is what makes it perfect for days when you can't really do much else. It's also perfect for a Valentine's Day lunch because it's fancy (it has to be-- it's French!), riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiich, and warming.

I Love You (Snow-day) Soup

serves: 2

1) Cook some bacon!

     Ingredients:
     1 lb. good quality bacon (I used a maple brined bacon from Vermont, which I bought at Whole Foods)

     Directions:
     a) Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
     b) Line a 9x13 (or bigger) baking pan with aluminum foil.
     c) Fill pan with bacon strips (should be tightly packed to render more grease).
     d) Cook until crisped but still pliable (usually about 25-30 min).
     e) Remove bacon to a plate lined with paper towels and save the bacon grease (you need 2 tbsp.).
     f) You'll need the bacon grease and 3-4 slices of bacon. The rest of the bacon can be saved for morning-after-Valentine's Day brunch.

2) Caramelize your onions.

    Ingredients:
   2 tbsp. salted butter
   2 tbsp. bacon grease
   2 sweet onions
   1-2 garlic cloves
   2 sprigs thyme
   1 bay leaf
   salt and pepper to season
      
     Directions:
     a) Slice your onions in half (longways) and then into thin half-moons. I used my food processor but a mandolin will also do the trick.
     b) Mince or press your garlic cloves. I recently bought this press, and I'm obsessed with it.
     c) Melt your butter and bacon grease together in a soup pan set over medium-low.
     d) Add onions, garlic, thyme, bay leaf, salt, and pepper and stir to coat.
     e) Allow these to cook for a LONG time, stirring occasionally. Go read a book for at least an hour. When you are done, all the onion pieces should be at least slightly brown and very soft.

Before and after the caramelization process. The burnt pieces are normal, I swear.

3) Make your soup base.

     Ingredients:
     1/2 cup red wine (I used Merlot because I have a box of it open. DON'T JUDGE ME! You could also use white wine or beer depending on what cheese you're using.)
     1 heaping tbsp. all-purpose flour

     Directions:
     a) Turn stove heat up to medium.
     b) Add in red wine and stir to mix with caramelized onions.
     c) Allow to boil until wine boils off and onions dry, about 5-10 min. The onions will appear somewhat burnt. This is ok.

The onions getting darker because of the wine. Note that there will still be moisture from the oil, but the wine moisture should be gone.

     d) Remove bay leaf and thyme sprigs.
     e) Turn stove heat back down to medium-low.
     f) Add in flour and stir to coat onions.
     g) Cook for about 10 minutes, stirring regularly, to remove the flour taste from the onions. The onions will start to look crispy and burnt-fried when you do this. The dark color comes from the caramelization and the wine, so don't worry about this.

Make sure you cook the onion/flour mixture on low enough heat so that the burnt look is not *actually* burnt. But yeah, it will look pretty bad. Do not despair.

4) Make the soup.

     Ingredients:
     3-4 pieces of bacon, crumbled
     Quart of beef broth
     Salt and pepper

     Directions:
     a) Turn stove heat back up to medium.
     b) Add in bacon and broth.
     c) Bring to boil, and boil for 10 min.
     d) Taste, and season with salt and pepper as needed.

The wine and caramelization give your soup a beautiful color, and the flour gives it just enough thickness.

5) Make the croutons.

     Ingredients:
     4-6 slices baguette or Italian loaf (You need enough slices to fill up the top of an oven-safe bowl or ramekin. I always keep the partially baked Figelle from Trader Joe's in my freezer, so I used that.) 
    4-ish slices of melting cheese. Emmental and Gruyere are traditional. (I used Raclette because I love the heartiness of it. Really, any cheese that melts well will work. You could even use sharp cheddar, but then the onions should be cooked in a dark, malty beer rather than wine. Actually, that sounds delicious. Consider this post to be me patenting that idea.)
    2 tbsp. grated cheese such as Parmesan or Gouda (I grated up some smoked Gouda to go with the bacon.)

     Directions:
     a) Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.     
     b) Lay your slices of melting cheese on top of your bread slices. They should be sized to match.
     c) Fill 2 oven-safe bowls or ramekins with soup.
     d) Float your cheese-topped bread on top of soup. You can use additional cheese to fill in any gaps.

     e) Sprinkle with grated cheese.
     f) Bake for about 20 minutes or until cheese is melty and brown. It will likely puff up in the oven.
     g) Remove from oven (using mitts) and dig in. Be careful because it will be VERY hot. Much like your Valentine's Day love for your significant other. Or in my case, my Valentine's Day love for my Vitamix. 
     

If you want the top darker, stick it under the broiler for a skosh. I just prefer baking because it gives the bread some time to become one with the soup. And isn't that the point of Valentine's Day?